cfilter: unlink and discard

cfilter: unlink and discard

Rewrite the code that removes a filter from the connection and discards
it. Always look at the connection, otherwise it will not work of the
filter is at the top of the chain.

Change QUIC filter setup code to always tear down the chain in
construction when an error occured.

HTTP proxy, do not remove the h1/h2 sub filter on close. Leave it to be
discarded with the connection. Avoids keeping an additional pointer that
might become dangling.

Triggered by a reported on a code bug in discard method.

Reported-by: Joshua Rogers
Closes #18596