bcachefs: Btree key cache coherency

bcachefs: Btree key cache coherency

 - Updates to non key cache iterators will now be transparently
   redirected to the key cache for cached btrees.

 - Except when creating new keys: then the update goes to underlying
   btree

For for iterating over a cached btree to work, we need to ensure that if
a key exists in the key cache, it also exists in the btree - otherwise
the iterator code will skip past it and not check the key cache.

Otherwise, for consistency, all updates should go to the same place -
the key cache.

Signed-off-by: Kent Overstreet <kent.overstreet@linux.dev>