- add new event PoolEvents.invalidate(). allows interception of invalidation

- add new event PoolEvents.invalidate().  allows interception of invalidation
events including auto-invalidation, which is useful both for tests here as well as
detecting failure conditions within the "reset" or "close" cases.
- rename the argument for PoolEvents.reset() to dbapi_connection and connection_record
to be consistent with everything else.
- add new documentation sections on invalidation, including auto-invalidation
and the invalidation process within the pool.
- add _ConnectionFairy and _ConnectionRecord to the pool documentation.  Establish
docs for common _ConnectionFairy/_ConnectionRecord methods and accessors and
have PoolEvents docs refer to _ConnectionRecord,
since it is passed to all events.  Rename a few _ConnectionFairy methods that are actually
private to pool such as _checkout(), _checkin() and _checkout_existing(); there should not
be any external code calling these