MEDIUM: connection: complete the polling cleanups

MEDIUM: connection: complete the polling cleanups

I/O handlers now all use __conn_{sock,data}_{stop,poll,want}_* instead
of returning dummy flags. The code has become slightly simpler because
some tricks such as the MIN_RET_FOR_READ_LOOP are not needed anymore,
and the data handlers which switch to a handshake handler do not need
to disable themselves anymore.