build: tidy up internal feature detection variables for wolfSSL

build: tidy up internal feature detection variables for wolfSSL

Sync them with the function name they detect, and sync them between
cmake and autotools.

- rename `HAVE_WOLFSSL_BIO` to `HAVE_WOLFSSL_BIO_NEW`.
- rename `HAVE_WOLFSSL_FULL_BIO` to `HAVE_WOLFSSL_BIO_SET_SHUTDOWN`.
- autotools: rename `WOLFSSL_NTLM` to `HAVE_WOLFSSL_DES_ECB_ENCRYPT`
  (to sync with cmake).
- autotools: rename `WOLFSSL_BIO` to `HAVE_WOLFSSL_BIO_NEW`
  (to sync with cmake).
- autotools: simplify `HAVE_WOLFSSL_DES_ECB_ENCRYPT` detection.

Cherry-picked from #17082

Closes #17175